Goals

We got home  a week ago today from Arizona.  Considering I had the surgery (with requisite accompanying disasters) but 10 days ago, I'd say I'm doing pretty damn well.  But even so, I hurt.  I'm exhausted.  And it's hard not to be able to do my thing.  The last week was tough at times.  I had a migraine that really knocked me for a loop (took me awhile to figure out what was going on and I was freaked out).  Once that passed, life was better.  But I'm so happy it's behind me.  The future looks rosy to me now.  Once I get back on my feet I can walk forward.  For now, I crawl forward.

I set goals for myself, with the express realization that it's ok to not accomplish them if I'm honestly not up to it.  This is the time I have to rest.  In a few more weeks, I won't have the luxury to just not do something, however small, once school starts up.  I'm learning to be easier on myself.  My battle with my body over the past two decades has made me too much a hard ass.  I expect a lot.  I tend to push beyond reason, no matter what the physical cost to me.  And that's not always a good thing.

So, like I said, I'm setting little goals.  My first week home it was to get the checkbook updated and get the movies out of our little travel case and back into their boxes: done, but it took a week.  And that's ok.  It's still done!  This week I want to make a list of thank you notes to send out and order Anna's science books for fall.  I might set little goals for the day, like take a shower and get dressed.  That sounds like nothing, but it's exhausting, let me tell you!  But if I don't get out of my jammies for the day, that's ok, too.  It's ok not to be a hard ass sometimes--that's a goal in and of itself.

Blessings on your day.