Woot! Weight lowest since the vacation. So, naturally, today and tomorrow are planned scarb meals.
Figures....
A little blog about Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Sunday, July 21, 2013
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Random philosophical thought
Friendship, like any other living thing, needs attention to survive. If you have a plant, for example, you can't not water it and expect it to survive, let alone thrive.
There you have it. ;)
There you have it. ;)
Friday, July 19, 2013
Oink
Weight is up. Smile is down!
I pushed my luck after the vacation. Man, it's HARD for me to eat scarb free in the summer, with so much going on. Sigh. And really, I know it's true, but I like to forget my body just doesn't metabolize the way it should. I can eat the same # of calories of scarb or scarb free, and with the scarb, I gain, no matter what.
Feeling a bit discouraged about it, but started the day with a protein breakfast and lots of water. Time to knuckle down again and keep my scarb meals down to 3 meals per week--not 3 days per week like I've been doing!
I pushed my luck after the vacation. Man, it's HARD for me to eat scarb free in the summer, with so much going on. Sigh. And really, I know it's true, but I like to forget my body just doesn't metabolize the way it should. I can eat the same # of calories of scarb or scarb free, and with the scarb, I gain, no matter what.
Feeling a bit discouraged about it, but started the day with a protein breakfast and lots of water. Time to knuckle down again and keep my scarb meals down to 3 meals per week--not 3 days per week like I've been doing!
Sunday, July 14, 2013
Argh
Back up out of the zone today. :( I have no idea why, as I've only had "off" half a day where I had scarbs over the past week! Let's hope it's just an anomoly.
Not a fan of anomolies.
Not a fan of anomolies.
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Good news and good news
Back in the zone today, baby! The zone is 2# on either side of the LIW (last injection weight). I've been cruising, prior to our vacation, at 2# below. Today, I'm nearly 2# above. But not quite. Yeah, I'm steering towards the bottom end of the zone, and hope to be there soon. But, the key here is being back IN the zone. Yay, body! Good job!
VBS is all but done. We're at the halfway mark for the last day. The VBS itself is done, and all that's left is the family program tonight. Well, then there's other stuff for those of us who lead it, like striking the set and a lot of paperwork, thank you notes, thank you gifts, etc. All part of the service, ma'am.
;)
VBS is all but done. We're at the halfway mark for the last day. The VBS itself is done, and all that's left is the family program tonight. Well, then there's other stuff for those of us who lead it, like striking the set and a lot of paperwork, thank you notes, thank you gifts, etc. All part of the service, ma'am.
;)
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
VBS and me
Let's see if this posts. My old computer doesn't like the Blogger tech. But, I'll try. If it won't post, at least it's a good opportunity for me to focus my thoughts.
So, yeah. VBS! This is our eighth year. It was conceived, by me, when Anna was four. Our church is small (as are most churches in my area) and attended mostly by older people. So, when I said to my pastors, I think we should have a VBS and I'd be happy to run it, they embraced it with warmth, enthusiasm, and class.
Eight years later and we're still going. Most of the attendees are from the community, as our church sports a relatively low number of kids. Most of them come, too. The only kid to come to all eight is my kid! There are a couple of kids who've come to seven, which is pretty cool. Our pastors are super gifted and have much ability in the arts, as in, decor, skits, and music. I wish everybody could see it--they're awesome. But, somebody has to run it. That somebody is me.
As you likely know, I suffer from chronic pain and fatigue. So, physically, for me, what's normal to pretty much everybody else, is really hard for me. My daily life is a balancing act: If I do this, I can't do that. I am some sort of savant at prioritizing. I've had to be. So, when something different comes up, there's a physical toll. This is mitigated in part by super good planning, which is my strength.
It's why I can run a VBS. But, being an uber planner is not without its dark side. Like, say, if my plans don't pan out, it doesn't make me happy in my heart. Frankly, I find lame excuses, laziness, and bad decisions intolerable. Poor communication makes me homicidal. The worst of it for me is if somebody drops the ball, especially a ball I don't feel they needed to drop. These are things outside the "S**t Happens" credo, things out of anybody's control--those things I can handle. I'm fairly light on my feet. But, if somebody was supposed to do something (especially if I did the prep and/or legwork) and doesn't do it, I can burn with the fury of 1000 suns.
This...is not a good thing. And I'm working on it--not just in any leadership situations, but in my life. I take it hard when people let me down, in minor or major ways. I take it to heart. I've thought, more than once, If I can do this (with my physical disabilities), why can't they? I feel it as a rejection, not just an irritant. This is made clear to me every year at VBS, as are a lot of things.
I realized this yesterday: VBS is my yearly litmus test. It's not just an opportunity for Christian ministry (and getting to do something with my skill set besides laundry), but an opportunity to test my personal growth. How am I compared to last year? And the results aren't always pretty.
Sure, I do see, for the most part, this year I'm more relaxed than in past years. I realized after the first one, I was allowing VBS to canibalize me. I noticed this year, I'm doing better because, maybe for the first time, I don't feel like I'm running it by burning soulfire (see Dresden Files for further details), at least not as much.
Who am I this year compared to who I was last year? Am I improving? Am I more patient? And I able to focus on the individuals and not just the functioning? Am I missing out on actually taking a few moments and watching my child enjoy herself? That IS why I started this--my child! She can get lost in it for me. And when I realize that, as I have in the past, it hurts me deeply.
How am I? And I a better friend? A better leader? A better mother? A better wife? A better daughter? A better Christian? My orginzational skills aren't at issue here. I can run a tight VBS. I'd throwdown with anyone on that score. But at the end of the day, does that matter? Not really. What matters is people, not projects.
So, yeah. VBS! This is our eighth year. It was conceived, by me, when Anna was four. Our church is small (as are most churches in my area) and attended mostly by older people. So, when I said to my pastors, I think we should have a VBS and I'd be happy to run it, they embraced it with warmth, enthusiasm, and class.
Eight years later and we're still going. Most of the attendees are from the community, as our church sports a relatively low number of kids. Most of them come, too. The only kid to come to all eight is my kid! There are a couple of kids who've come to seven, which is pretty cool. Our pastors are super gifted and have much ability in the arts, as in, decor, skits, and music. I wish everybody could see it--they're awesome. But, somebody has to run it. That somebody is me.
As you likely know, I suffer from chronic pain and fatigue. So, physically, for me, what's normal to pretty much everybody else, is really hard for me. My daily life is a balancing act: If I do this, I can't do that. I am some sort of savant at prioritizing. I've had to be. So, when something different comes up, there's a physical toll. This is mitigated in part by super good planning, which is my strength.
It's why I can run a VBS. But, being an uber planner is not without its dark side. Like, say, if my plans don't pan out, it doesn't make me happy in my heart. Frankly, I find lame excuses, laziness, and bad decisions intolerable. Poor communication makes me homicidal. The worst of it for me is if somebody drops the ball, especially a ball I don't feel they needed to drop. These are things outside the "S**t Happens" credo, things out of anybody's control--those things I can handle. I'm fairly light on my feet. But, if somebody was supposed to do something (especially if I did the prep and/or legwork) and doesn't do it, I can burn with the fury of 1000 suns.
This...is not a good thing. And I'm working on it--not just in any leadership situations, but in my life. I take it hard when people let me down, in minor or major ways. I take it to heart. I've thought, more than once, If I can do this (with my physical disabilities), why can't they? I feel it as a rejection, not just an irritant. This is made clear to me every year at VBS, as are a lot of things.
I realized this yesterday: VBS is my yearly litmus test. It's not just an opportunity for Christian ministry (and getting to do something with my skill set besides laundry), but an opportunity to test my personal growth. How am I compared to last year? And the results aren't always pretty.
Sure, I do see, for the most part, this year I'm more relaxed than in past years. I realized after the first one, I was allowing VBS to canibalize me. I noticed this year, I'm doing better because, maybe for the first time, I don't feel like I'm running it by burning soulfire (see Dresden Files for further details), at least not as much.
Who am I this year compared to who I was last year? Am I improving? Am I more patient? And I able to focus on the individuals and not just the functioning? Am I missing out on actually taking a few moments and watching my child enjoy herself? That IS why I started this--my child! She can get lost in it for me. And when I realize that, as I have in the past, it hurts me deeply.
How am I? And I a better friend? A better leader? A better mother? A better wife? A better daughter? A better Christian? My orginzational skills aren't at issue here. I can run a tight VBS. I'd throwdown with anyone on that score. But at the end of the day, does that matter? Not really. What matters is people, not projects.
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
Post vacation weight stat
3.5# above the zone. :( No bueno.
Sometimes I have an easy time getting right back on the mostly scarb-free bandwagon after vacation, other times not. Now's one of those times. It was out of the frying pan and into the fire as soon as we got back (a few days ago), as one of the biggest things of the year is coming up fast for me: Vacation Bible School.
After that, things look to be slowing down to a more comfortable pace (for my chronic-pain body and mind).
Sometimes I have an easy time getting right back on the mostly scarb-free bandwagon after vacation, other times not. Now's one of those times. It was out of the frying pan and into the fire as soon as we got back (a few days ago), as one of the biggest things of the year is coming up fast for me: Vacation Bible School.
After that, things look to be slowing down to a more comfortable pace (for my chronic-pain body and mind).
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