Good Heavens! Are you still trying to win?
-Princess Bride

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Happy birthday, Mom

She'd have been 73 today.

Maybe it's being sick, but I feel pretty emotional about that today. I miss her and frankly, I'm mad at her for her suicide by cigarette. Many wonderful people die of lung disease who had no choice in the matter. She did.

I know smoking is a horrible addiction. I know it's hard to quit. But, when you strip down the habit and the excuses, in the end, she chose cigarettes over living a longer life, seeing her grandchildren grow up. And I feel pretty angry and bitter about that.

Heck, I was 39 when she died and I feel like she didn't get to see me grow up, either!

I just miss her, that's all.

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