.6 Meh

I guess I should be happy, but I'm not. It's only been a couple of pounds o'er a couple o'weeks. And it's not FAIR! I'm sure you know that's an issue for me. I hate doing everything right only to fail. It's not *supposed* to go like this. I should have sailed right past my goal by now and be into bonus pounds, not 6.6# above my goal. And my goal wasn't even terribly ambitious or unrealistic.

Life not being fair has always rankled me. In college I decided I wanted to do something about it, so I planned on becoming a lawyer. The good kind. The kind that works tirelessly to help those who are getting knocked around...you guessed it...unfairly. I never even considered that lawyers make a lot of money. In my jaded dotage I kind of chuckle at that now as we've struggled with money our whole married life--because I was unable to become a lawyer (or anything else) because of my health--all of which IS. NOT. FAIR.

So fast forward five years when I met a good doctor and I thought I'd be able to recover my health. She was so different and pulled from both naturopathic and allopathic sources and I thought my time had come. So I decided if/when I got better (still being infertile at that point), I'd go into healthcare and serve those who were getting knocked around and get them the help they needed.

Then I a) didn't get better I b) finally became a mom and my health has been an ever-downward spiral so instead of fighting the good fight for the earth and its downtrodden, on a good day I can hope to do and put away a load of dishes.